How to use it to help manage your emotions

The Feeling Wheel - How to use it to help manage your emotions

The Feeling wheel

I thought I’d do an article on the Feeling Wheel

I very often use this with clients when helping them to explore how they are really feeling.

The Feeling wheel is often used with the Emotional Freedom Technique but in this case, I like to use it, as I said, to help people to explore how they are really feeling.

As you could see, it has got a lot of words but lets at this time pay attention to what’s
going on right in the middle. For the 6 basic core feelings that we’ve all got. Peaceful, sad, mad, scared, joyful, powerful.

Let me just concentrate on one of them at the moment – Mad.

A lot of people know when they are angry. Just to say that they are angry! They know instantly when they are mad. But to really home in on what they are really feeling, a lot of people don’t know. It is easy to say that they are mad but what is really going on for you? If you look on the second
level of words leading from mad. You’ve got the words hurt, hostile, angry, selfish, hateful, critical. Those words would more home into what you are really feeling.

Yes as I said, its quite easy to say that they you mad but what’s really going on there are you hurt?
Are you feeling quite critical Are you hostile, what’s really going on?
Then you’ve got the one’s on the outer edge there. Are you frustrated? Irritated? Distant?
All this does is really homes in on what you’re person’s feeling.

You’ve got scared here as well
Are you feeling anxious, rejected, confused? Or inadequate, that’s usually quite a good one as when someone’s feeling quite anxious, they are actually feeling quite inadequate. And you’ve got the same here for sad. I’m just starting with the negative At the moment.

With sad. Are you ashamed? Bored? Lonely? Isolated?

What this does, as I said, it just homes in and helps a person to be more clear
of how they are really feeling because that’s where communication comes in.

If someone is not really clear over how they are really feeling, they cant really communicate
it to somebody else for someone else to be clear.

At the bottom here you have more positive emotions: Peaceful, powerful, joyful

And if you start here with joyful. You can home in on the words cheerful, excited, stimulated and optimistic.
And the same with powerful – respected and important
Peaceful you have loving and pensive

You can use the feeling wheel in several ways. As I said, One is by homing in on what you are feeling, what’s going on for you. Being able to communicate this with somebody else.

Another way, if someone is saying they are feeling quite irritated, directly opposite that is powerful. That represents ideally how you would like to feel.
For instance, as I said, If you are feeling quite irritated. If you look under powerful. I could identify what you would want to feel. Perhaps you are not feeling, valuable, worthwhile. Perhaps you are not feeling respected. So that’s irritating you.

So you would be able to communicate with someone. “I am feeling irritated because you are not respecting me”.

And the same here with You might feel quite helpless, because you are not being nurtured. If you look on the opposite direction, you need to feel secure, you need to feel content and that’s what lacking at the moment.

If you are feeling fearful the opposite is to that is gratitude as it is really important when dealing with fear.

When we are looking at sad, if someone’s feeling quite sad and lonely and isolated as we’ve got here. The opposite feeling to that is feeling creative and hopeful. Hope is a good thing to feel.

And having something, especially if you are bored, you’ve got here under sad, it identifies that you need to find something stimulating.

I hope you find that useful Please feel free to ask questions by sending me an email or by commenting down below.

I am a Therapist based in Sutton Coldfield, UK also available online.

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